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Normalizing The Jobs We Love

Call It A “Side Hustle”

I’ve worked at a restaurant for five years now. It’s been a huge source of my income throughout college and even after I graduated. Society made me feel like working as a server, bartender, or shift manager in the food service industry was almost embarrassing because of my education level. Expectations of our college graduates had me looking for jobs that didn’t sound remotely interesting because I couldn’t work in a restaurant

forever.

I liked my job so much that I told my baby brother to work there too – so we’re roomies, coworkers, siblings, and friends. Crazy, right?

First off, I want to say that you can do whatever makes you happy for your whole life. You can serve, teach, write, coach, strip, or mine bitcoin if that’s what makes you happy and pays the bills. Who has the right to tell you otherwise? Second, working that restaurant job that I thought I had to move on from so quickly allowed me to fund my own business that was making absolutely NO money at first.

Knowing Your Worth

There’s a difference between doing what brings you joy and knowing your worth. Also, it’s important to understand that no matter what your education level, class, or financial standing, your time is worth money. Having a food service job has allowed me to price myself fairly in all aspects of my business. I have education and experience in this career, there is no reason that I should be making a larger hourly wage as a server. If that’s the case, find clients, brands, and businesses who will pay you FAIRLY!

I’m lucky that I really like both my jobs – I mean… I get paid to do skincare routines on Instagram. NORMALIZE DOING NONCONVENTIONAL AND FUN JOBS!

End Goal: Paying the Bills

I’ve always had a weird relationship with money. Even when I have a good amount of it saved, I want to know I have more constantly coming in. I want to be finding ways to increase my income streams. Watching two parents hustle for as long as I have, it’s part of my nature to just want to work really really hard for as long as humanly possible!

The end goal, however, is always to pay the bills. Like millions of others in the United States, I have thousands of dollars in student loan debt that makes for a hefty bill each month. If I can have a business AND a restaurant job that alleviates some of the stress of that bill, why wouldn’t I? Paying your rent, filling your fridge, and treating yourself is nothing to turn your nose up to. Those who judge you for the way that you pay your bills probably aren’t the ones we want to be taking financial advice from. Am I right?

Normalizing the Jobs We Love

If you’re paying your bills, you’re doing pretty well. The fact that we turn up our nose at certain jobs or industries even though they’re what bring us joy seems silly. Unless those pushing you to be a lawyer are going to be paying your mortgage, they don’t really have a say in law school!

If you need more proof, Giorgio Armani worked as a photographer’s assistant while on leave from the Italian military because he was obsessed with the art, fashion, and creativity aspect of life. He made $1.67 an hour but did what he loved and eventually paid WAY more than the bills (he’s worth $6.6 million dollars). Normalizing jobs we love isn’t a way of accepting average but realizing that we’re usually money magnets when we’re happy.

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I Fear My Own Success

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Recently, I’ve been listening to a podcast called “The RISE Podcast with Rachel Hollis”. If you recognize the name, it’s because she’s written books like Girl, Wash Your Face and Girl, Stop Apologizing. Her and husband also run a multi-million dollar media company that they essentially started from scratch aka MY DREAM.

When I listen to podcasts, it’s usually while I’m doing 15 other things to be completely honest. Like, I’ll be folding laundry or cleaning and listening. Or, I’ll be bullet journaling and “listening”. In those instances, I find myself missing some stuff and having to go back every so often. If you haven’t found out yet, humans aren’t good multitaskers (but that, is for another day, another blog.) With this podcast, I have to listen to it when I’m doing literally nothing else OR I have to have my iPad near me to jot down some notes if I feel so inclined. Listening made me realize that that’s the kind of information that I want to give you. Yes, of course there’s an entertainment level about all of this. But, if I want to start making a real difference, I have to pull out all the stops and just completely give you what I know.

I was listening to “What’s Keeping You from Making a Million Dollars?” when I kind of realized that I’m terrified of my own success. Not in a way that I don’t want money, I don’t want people to download the podcast, or that I don’t want people to follow my media platforms. No, I’m starting to realize that I’m terrified by what real success represents in my life.

This is because I’m terrified of both change and the unknown. I journaled about this today, so I feel like I understand my inner dialogue a little more. But, truthfully, I would rather sit in the comfort (or even discomfort) of where I am right now, then be successful and change my lifestyle. Think about it, when you’re abundantly successful, everything changes. Your home life, your schedule, your work load, your relationships, and everything in between. In order to be successful, you have to also welcome those changes. This is something I haven’t been doing at all. Like yes, I want to make more money, but I’m not willing to give up the flexibility in my schedule that I currently have if I do become that successful. Or yes, I would love to make this a more permanent livelihood, but I’m not sure I would be ready to move.

None of this is to say that you don’t have a say in how you are successful. You are the queen of your own journey – in whatever that journey is. BUT, it’s more a realization that with levels of success comes natural changes to lifestyle, schedule, work ethics, and just plain life. Fear of those changes will ward away a certain level of success that is absolutely obtainable if you’re “all in” as they say.

Since I was a kid, I have felt in my bones that I was supposed to be heard. When I was younger, that dream was about being a singer and famous. As I grew up and entered dark stages of my life, I genuinely didn’t think I would make it to a point that I could stand in front of people and be heard – so I wrote. In the last few years, I’ve gone from wanting to be a politician to just wanting to be an advocate for those struggling to find their own. Now, I feel this fire in my soul that what I have to say is meant for more than just a couple hundred followers. I have this eye on a prize of success, when I don’t really know what that means yet. I say this to my family and close friends all the time, but this journey really does feel like a time bomb that’s just waiting to burst onto the scene. Maybe, the reason this bomb hasn’t exploded is because my fear of the aftermath.

I’m writing this with so much certainty in my tone not because I’m naive of the chance of failure, but because this finally feels like the spark I felt as a kid is getting bigger. It finally feels like I’m growing into the person that 5 year old Emily would be proud of. When abundant success does happen, life will change. BUT, those key people, aspects, and players will change along with it; to adapt to this new found success. So, my little sweeties, this is the year I welcome success and consider all the forms it’s presented to me in. Change is scary as fuck – business or no business. But, the only way I can keep this spark growing is if I allow the flame to build and other parts of my life to catch on fire along with my soul.

So, I just realized I fear my own success… and I’m not scared anymore.

Must Be Funny, In a Rich Man’s World

January 10, 2020June 10, 2020Leave a comment

I don’t have a relationship with money. Even when I have plenty to pay all my bills, save some, and do fun stuff, it never really feels like enough. I read a book once that said that you have stress about things that were surrounded by stress in your formative years.

I knew that I always had food, a warm bed, clothes, and my own bed every single night. I was able to do a lot of things that children around me couldn’t. Being hyperaware, though, has always been a curse as well as a blessing. My parents never talked about money with me. Never told me if they were struggling – on the contrary, my dad always said “you can always make more money” or “we will make it work”. That being said, I don’t come from a long line of royalty or business moguls either. I don’t have a trust fund & the value of a dollar became very apparent very early on.

Literally the cutest family ever. Sullivan did make it cuter I will admit.

My parents worked their asses off to get where they are. Like many in their generation, they don’t have these Masters degrees in their field, but were able work their way up. I spent my childhood watching my parents move up into jobs that valued you them more, paid them better, and that they loved doing. At 14, I wanted to be able to *kind of* provide for myself. I got a job in childcare at our church. My first paycheck I became obsessed with the idea of saving, not having enough, and having more.

Some of my friends never had to, and still don’t really have to, worry about a job. They have a credit card linked to their dad’s personal checking account for when times get too tough… and if that’s you, God bless you, dude. Good for your parents. Good for whoever made the fortune for the family – you and I just live very different lives.

At 14, I started to get worried about saving for college. 14 years old. I mean, I had to go to school and I could only work X amount of hours in a week. The thought of my parents paying my way made me sick to my stomach. Again, if your parents had that ability or that was your family’s plan, more fucking power to you. It just makes me REALLY uncomfortable. In my head, my parents are supposed to make sure I have food, shelter, and love. Even that, is more than some people have. I didn’t want or need them to pay for school… I could do that myself.

Let’s not get it twisted; my parents did put their credit on the line to co-sign on a lot of bullshit for me. Especially these student loans, so again, couldn’t have done it without them. After 4.5 years, I was happy to receive my diploma on my own merit, payments that I had made, and debt I had taken on myself.

My parent’s graduation gift to me was paying off a couple private loans. That gift cuts one of my monthly payments in half and takes care of thousands of dollars of school debt. I didn’t feel like I could accept it, even if it was a gift. It was their money – money that they could use to take trips, buy something lavish, or just save.

As I’m writing this, I’m thinking about rent, utilities, my car payment, loans, credit card, and just the price of being alive. There are huge steps I need to take in learning better ways to save money. I need to take better advantage of my monthly budget. God knows, I need to cool it on eating out so much. BUT, the first step of making money and having a good relationship with it has been instilled in me since I was a kid – work your ass off.

Spending someone else’s money is fun and exciting, but earning your own and supporting yourself is soooo empowering. So, if you find yourself spending a lot of money on things that seem temporary, I would challenge you with the question: Do I value one dollar? Do I value my time as a means of making money? Am I spending money to cope with something else? Odds are, one or more of those questions will lead you to some pretty vulnerable realizations about your relationship with money.

I actually really like current my job. I work with my best friends and I’m good at what I do. PLUS, sometimes we get to meet sweet baby angels like these puppies. But, I don’t see myself doing this forever.

I still struggle with moments of stress when it comes to money. I question the path of content creation I’ve chosen and whether it will be as fruitful and successful as I imagine my later life to be. And sure, I could join a corporate office that draws on my majors and make a salary and have a lot less unknown. I made a decision, though, that I would rather be happy, doing what I love, and living a somewhat more restrictive life in terms of finances than working in an office, feeling stale and unhappy, but having extra money in my bank account.

I’m recently listening to the RISE podcast with Rachel Hollis who is a multimillion dollar business owner with just a high school degree. She’s the author of books like “Girl, Wash Your Face” that have become all the rage in today’s younger success-hungry demographic. I listen and actually TAKE NOTES on her words, because her path is something I’m striving for. She always says “there are a LOT of ways to make money and pay your bills.” Which is so true! Money is circling around every industry, every career, and is waiting to be given to driven, motivated people. So, even if the moments now are stressful, I have to remember the end goal is getting paid for doing what you LOVE rather than settling for what you like.

Money is stressful. It’s a huge part of everyone’s mental health. But, you can always make it.. you WILL figure it out, and regardless of what your bank account looks like, you’re worthy of happiness, relaxation, and serenity. This is just as much a reminder for me as it is for all of you.