Social Media vs. Reality

I use my Instagram account to post moments in my life that I want to share. The moments in between aren’t captured in that photo, video, or reel. Truthfully, though, those moments are what make up who I am, how I act, and the person that you see in the posts. I try to be as honest as possible on my social media feed. I’m pretty much willing to talk about anything and everything that’s plaguing my day to day life. One thing that I do want all my readers to know, though, is there’s a difference in my social media versus reality. No matter how hard I try, there’s going to be things that I might not find relevant for a whole post, but that happen to me at the same rate as any other 23 year old woman. 

I Have Dating Problems

I have chosen to put my whole life online. In doing so, I’ve shared stories about past relationships and things that are about as un-sexy as it comes. One thing that I needed to learn was that not everyone signed up for this life. I’ve had to be very cognizant to communicate first, analyze, and only share when I’ve actually gained something worth sharing. 

Anyone can pick up a laptop, open WordPress, and type all the grievances they have with their partner. Not only does that make for highly negative content, but it’s also not great for resolving any issues. So, though you might not see a bunch of content on it, I do have the dating problems like most 20-somethings have. 

I’m on the stupid dating apps. I get ghosted from time to time and take it way too personally. I have absolutely said, “I’ll probably end up alone,” in the last year even though I would smack any of my followers for saying the same. That’s what this blog is about. My mindset about life is not always perfect. The actions and words that I have in certain situations occasionally end up being mistakes. EmyDBlog, however, is a place of acceptance past all of the supporting moments in your life so that you can truly enjoy the IG-worthy ones!

I Worry About Money

I’ve absolutely talked about money problems on here, right? It’s definitely one of my biggest stressors in life. It’s not even because I constantly struggle – I just don’t feel like I have the best relationship with money. When I have a lot, I feel like I should be doing something to make more. When I don’t have much, I feel like a failure.

My parents are ready to transfer money to me when I need it after one single phone call, but part of me would rather sell my kidney. Why is that? I don’t post about money often because it gives me goosebumps and truthfully, I look to other people for guidance. 

If there’s one thing I know, it’s that I’m not an expert at finances, saving, or investing. For that kind of information, I go elsewhere. So, unless it could value my followers in a feeling of community, there’s no reason for me to spend time talking about a topic that stresses me out. Be warned, though, when I do finally understand how stocks work and I’m making hand over fist… it’s OVER for you guys.

I Have Mental Health Issues

This is something that I’ve posted a lot about. As a mental health blogger, I’ve been very open about the fact that I have bad days. My bad days are not only the ones that I post online, just like I have a lot of great moments that my iPhone can’t capture. 

Sometimes, my days might be a little too dark to sum up in an Instagram post. It’s not because I don’t want to share it – I feel that’s an important role that I’ve taken on. Nope, it’s because I haven’t always found the right words to wrap round it.

So, yes. I allow you into my struggle most of the time. One of my favorite quotes, though, is “just because I’m carrying it with ease doesn’t mean it isn’t heavy.” In other words, just because I’ve gotten used to sharing and being vulnerable doesn’t mean that it doesn’t still take courage and motivation every single time to get through. 

I Have Body Image Issues

My friends and family are quite literally saints. They’re willing to take one million photos of me just for me to say none of them are good enough. Usually, I hate the angle, the way my chin looks, or how my stomach looks just a little too big. As a body positivity blogger, this is problematic.

Every word I’ve said about loving your body is true. I have learned to stifle out the hatred for my body with love. It doesn’t, however, mean that I don’t have to constantly work at having a positive mindset. I have days where I change out of my dress to wear leggings instead. I have bad days just like any other human being! 

When you see the photos of me being a strong, confident queen, that’s the truth. But, you also need to realize that I have moments where I have to work on my inner dialogue and be nicer to myself that you don’t see on those tiny Instagram squares.

The Takeaway

Social media can be a beautiful thing. It can also be horrendously ugly. Each post is a snapshot of one moment, one event, one memory in time. It doesn’t include all the other tiny things leading up to that photo – both good and bad. 

The grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side. But, rather than obsessing over someone else’s grass… why don’t we try watering our own? Why don’t we start to love what we’re posting because it makes us FEEL good? What if we operated under the assumption that everyone’s social media is the highlight reel of their life because no one is going to include the embarrassing fumbles or screw ups in there. Even those of us who are willing to share some of the screw ups still can only share snapshots in time. I can’t share both sides, the whole thing, or every emotion even if I wanted to! Social media is not reality, my friends. Remember that. 

The Biggest Mistake A Budding Influencer Can Make

It doesn’t take a magic spell to become an influencer. We’ve all been at that moment where we’re questioning whether we’re hot enough, successful enough, and talented enough to become one. The answer is if you’re dedicated to having a following and providing value to it, you will become one. I’ve seen a lot of stuff and guided some people through some online mistakes. However, I’ve narrowed down one biggest mistake a budding influencer can make.

Influencers are All Different

I work with a lot of different types of influencers. I work with women who are younger than me and working on brand deals. Each day I text moms that are just kind of breaking into the space. I have two clients that have written successful books you can find on Amazon!! Crazy. 

No one follower in your audience is the same. Sure, they might share interests. Like you and I, however, they all have different experiences and lives that make them really relate to different stories. Where one follower might go nuts with GRWM (Get Ready With Me) video from one influencer, makeup might truly not be her thing at all.

The need for influencers of different age ranges, sexual orientations, career paths, interests, ethnicities, and just general focuses is SO important. It’s what Instagram pictures are different when you’re scrolling through. It is also what provides valuable information to EVERYONE on the platform, rather than just Gen Z users.

The Big Whammy

If there’s one nugget of free PR advice you take from me when it comes to Instagram, it’s do NOT participate in buying followers. Buying bots to act as place holders for real people on your page does nothing for your journey to making money on IG. Sure, that number looks really pretty but it essentially means nothing. 

Companies can tell the quality of your interactions and your followers. When they see that you have 35 followers with a different variation of “@Sarah123456” you don’t look like a credible person to partner with. Also, you don’t really have a “following” to promote their product to as they’re not looking to market to bots. 

Engagement Rate

I’ve come across accounts that have hundreds of thousands of followers that get 1,000 likes on a photo. That’s a problem. That means that the quality of your following is low. Even if they are real people, they’re not actively participating in the content that you’re posting. Again, that’s a red flag that you couldn’t sell a product for a company aka no brand deals!

My clients at EmyD Media and I are ALWAYS working toward the golden 20% engagement ratio. It’s absolutely not easy and requires time, patience, and good content. Even with an amazing engagement rate, brand deals are not a given! For more information about where your engagement rate can use some tweaking, contact me through the “Work with Me” tab!

Bonus Advice

Just because I like you guys so much, I’ll even give you a little more information. Stop participating in those buy-in follow giveaways. It’s a waste of money to watch your engagement rate absolutely TANK.

If you want to do a giveaway where you’re spending money, buy the product/giftcard/etc yourself as an investment that you would have spent into the buy-in. Make yourself the ONLY person that you have to follow in this transaction. No user wants to follow 15 other accounts for a chance to win a gift card. Also, odds of all those people interacting with you after the giveaway is over is small – again, tanking your engagement rate.

Unless you’re consistently doing little giveaways, they are just another way of buying followers. Your content should be what attracts people to your page, not your money! Believe me, there’s influencers making a LOT of money who aren’t paying their followers a cent of it monetarily. They give back in more quality content, better equipment, and more opportunities to connect!

Was this helpful to you? Get in touch with me through any of my socials below!

There’s Too Much On My Plate!

If you follow me at all, you know that I’m a busy lady. I’ve been taking photos as a side hustle since 2017. I launched a podcast, then re-launched it, in 2019. This blog is now a year old. I also make money through a survival, service industry job and freelance my PR to start my dream profession! It’s a lot. I love being busy. My “To Do” list is almost never empty – it would drive some people crazy, but it reminds me that I’m becoming successful! However, there’s a fine line between workaholic and breakdown because of stress, right? These days, there are moments where I have to remind myself to slow down and repeat “there’s too much on my plate,” when other things to agree to come up.

A Helping of Work

This weekend was one of the busiest in a while. For my business, the couple days surrounding the end and the beginning of each month are absolutely insane. It’s about getting insights done, contracts written for the upcoming month, and being diligent about the Public Relations changes that we’ve made throughout the month. The transition from September to October of this year was one of the busiest for my business. For that, I am unbelievably blessed. However, I’m also taking on challenges like I don’t have the clientele and following that I do. Sometimes I need to slow down!

Slowing down, however, means pumping the brakes on something that I’ve been working on for so many months now. It also means finding priorities in my days. Some things have to wait until tomorrow. Other things, like the needs of my clients, need to be done quickly and successfully. Yes, it’s a lot. However, it’s something that I’ve been working on for so long. I’m blessed to be busy with my work. Rather than thinking, “Ugh, I wish I wasn’t so busy,” I am going to reframe it as “I’m blessed to call what I love work & if I wasn’t supposed to be doing this, I wouldn’t be.”

A Helping of Birthday

This weekend was my beautiful roommate, Shelby’s, birthday! We celebrated her on Friday with a small group of friends at our house. The pandemic always adds a layer of stress to things that would otherwise go off without a second thought. This year, we hosted the event at our apartment, since we’re not going to go to bars! I’ll say it – I’m an AWESOME hostess. I was happy to put out food, grab a little cake, and clean the house.

It was an amazing day to celebrate a great friend! Entertaining is always high maintenance, but even more so in a pandemic. I wanted to make sure that all of our surfaces were not only clean, but completely disinfected. It was important that everyone had somewhere to sit. By no means was this party imperative, however, my friends mean the world to me. If we can have a night of normalcy to celebrate our girl, that’s a priority to me! I was happy to take it on my plate. So, instead of “I have to clean the house,” it was “I get to see my friends.”

A Helping of Marriage

I had the absolute honor of photographing the wedding of some of my favorite clients. Photography has absolutely taken the back burner to the other aspects of EmyD. I’ve had amazing success with EmyD Photography, but it’s not what I want to do as my full-time job. However, having big shoots like this always lights a fire under my butt to get more creative and inspired with my content.

Someone’s wedding day is the Big Kahuna of photography. As much as I love senior shots, you can always get another beautiful day to retake if necessary. You can’t redo the elements of a wedding that the couple wants to capture forever. There’s moments like the first look, the kiss, and the dances that are so “in the moment” that they become high pressure.

Maybe the reason that I don’t want to be a full-time photographer is because I’m so tense and perfectionistic when it comes to my work. I’ve had lists and Pinterest boards preparing for this wedding for weeks. Emily, the bride, is also a planner which made me feel a little more sane. She was so organized and amazing. Honestly, her preparedness calmed everyone around her down, but I like to walk into my shoots with that same level of confidence and organization! Though it was a mentally exhausting day, it was amazing. I’m so happy to have been a part of it. So, instead of “I have to prepare for this long day of shooting,” it became, “I am blessed to get paid for doing things that make me feel creative, inspired, and motivated.”

Reframing a Full Plate

Yes, I put a lot on my plate. I always have and truthfully, I don’t see that changing any time soon. The way that I look at it, there’s a couple ways to go about being busy in life. You can be resentful that your life is busy or that you didn’t have to get up to go to meetings with clients. You can wish that you didn’t have to post consistently, but that would mean that your following would decrease. 

Or, you can do what I do. I choose to run with it. There are some days where I absolutely just need like 12 hours of sleep which came to me at 8:30pm this Saturday night. However, I wouldn’t trade being busy for being bored. If I didn’t feel pressure to post, it would mean that I was still hustling for a following. If I didn’t feel like I had to prepare content, it would mean that I wasn’t signing clients. photoshoots like weddings are a lot to prepare for, but without them I wouldn’t be able to get creative for a job!

Sometimes, I have to ask for help in carrying my plate. I’ve asked Sullivan to help me at shoots. There’s been moments when my lovely clients are patient with me so that they get the best product. But agreeing to the things that you want to do, loading only what you want onto your agenda, and being your true self will make being busy so much more enjoyable. Yes, there’s too much on my plate… but I wouldn’t have it any other way.


What have you been really busy with? Let me know in my socials below!

Having the PR Perfect Instagram

A Public Relations degree has always been my safety net. Pretty much every field needs a Public Relations professional doing work as they reach a certain level of business. God knows that if something goes wrong, you absolutely need someone in PR to help sort out the chaos. Basically, my degree in PR was job security in something that I was decently good at. I’ve also gotten really good having the PR Perfect Instagram.

Did I think that I would be doing freelance PR at 23 years old? No, not really. In a global pandemic, we’ve all had to get a little creative in how we’re earning our money, how we’re planning on doing so in the future, and how we’re keeping ourselves sane. For our essential workers, that means leaving the house everyday. Teachers have to completely change how they connect with children and focus on the best ways to do so through a computer. For those of us in the internet sphere, it meant a lot more people and businesses entering the game. 

Listen, that’s not always a bad thing. From a PR perspective, quantity means more potential clients to hire me. However, also from the PR perspective, I only keep those clients if they see big, noticeable changes – which is hard in a super competitive space!  

As part of my consultation process, I offer an Instagram Profile Audit. This process basically takes a look at one’s profile through the lens of Public Relations. It asks the questions that businesses ask before they approach influencers for brand deals such as follower count, engagement levels, demographics, insights, active audience, and such. Follower count is something that anyone can see from just looking at your profile, right? Easy. But, if a company were to glance through your Instagram right now, would they see that you’re taking advantage of all the tools IG has to offer?

Having the PR Perfect IG

Obviously, I go in-depth with each of these in an actual consultation. My clients and I go over how just one word in your bio can change your look completely to a company! These three things, however, are something that I’m constantly touching on in my consults with influencers. They are something that I always ask them to think about and consider changing.

The PR Perfect Bio

I don’t want to put a lot of pressure on you, but writing a bio is extremely important when it comes to brand management and follower growth. A mentor of mine, Abby Helfer, once told me about my own Instagram that it’s like a boutique window. It shows us the pretty things to expect before we venture into the store (or our profile). 

Working with a PR Strategist to get this worded right can be game changing for your business. Like I said before, a simple change from the label “blogger” to “content creator” can be insanely effective. My biggest thing about bios is using the link that Instagram provides. My Instagram has links to my most recent blog post as that’s what I would like to direct traffic to. If you’re wanting to direct followers to a website, put it there. You can absolutely put a streaming channel like Twitch or Youtube in your bio. If you want people to click on a GoFundMe for Black Lives Matter (another one of my recent links), PUT IT THERE. 

However, don’t have it be a floating link. By that, I mean, that it’s an influencer’s job to explain why a click on that link is necessary. What value would that link give me as a follower?

The PR Perfect Highlight

If the bio is the boutique window, the highlights are the the first things you see when you walk into the store. They are the new releases, stuff on sale, and just beautiful ads that keeps everyone walking deeper into the store. 

Obviously, the way that you organize your Instagram highlights are up to personal preference. In terms of the best look for a brand, you want it to match the aesthetic of your profile. If you have photos with bright colors, highlights with those chromatics might be a good addition. If you post a lot of greens and landscapes in your photos, it might be worth your time to look for covers that match. Good old Pinterest has a ton of highlight covers that can be downloaded and used to your heart’s content.

At the end of the day, make sure that your highlights represent what you’ll find within your profile. They’re called highlights to be the absolute best moments from your story! Cohesive and clean are always best, but make sure that they’re representing you, your brand, and your product!

The PR Perfect Profile

Instagram allows us 30 hashtags per post. That’s 30 chances for people to find your content in a place where thousands of posts are going up every second. There is a debate amongst digital media experts about just how many hashtags you should be using in each post. Some say that you shouldn’t clutter your post – saying that 15 is enough. I, however, am part of the team that says that you should use all the tools that you’re given. If there’s an opportunity to use a hashtag, I say take it. You can see that in pretty much all of my IG posts. 

If I’m the first person to tell you that you should be using a call to action in your captions, I’m so sorry for the PR injustice you’ve been put through. All of your captions should call your audience to action in some way. It could be urging them to comment on the post (increase that engagement!), encouraging them to go to another page, or providing them with codes to buy your product or service!

Public relations that are more specific to and your profile are available with a FREE Instagram audit. Head over to the “Work With Me” tab to book yours!

Invest in Yourself and Invest in Your PR

Like every other business, you need to invest money to get it off the ground. For example, if you want to have a really successful blog, you will have to buy a domain or maybe invest in some writing courses!

Public relations and marketing online is absolutely worthy of your time and money investment. The best profiles have their target audience, collaborations, and business goals in mind when designing each part. Doing freelance PR has made me realize just how effective little tweaks in your profile can be. Your bio, highlights, and profile on Instagram are your first step in making more money online and connecting to your target audience!

Do you have questions about how your profile looks in terms of PR? Contact me on any of my socials below!

You Could Write a Book Today

** This post may contain affiliate links, which means I may receive a small commission, at no cost to you, if you make a purchase through one of the links! **

I was very careful not to put the word “if” at the beginning of the title for this blog. It’s “You Can Write a Book Today” because you can. I know you can. It’s possible. There’s really no “if” to add there.

Every time I go through a bookstore, scour the bookworm hashtag online, thrift for gems in large piles of books, or even just scroll through Amazon, I’m amazed at the sheer amount of books that exist. If you want my all time favorite book, you’d look for The Giver by Lois Lowry. If you wanted my favorite book in the personal growth genre, you’d look for You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero. There are genres, worlds, and cult-followings to appreciate all by opening a book. Crazy, right?

Realistically, you could write a book right now, right? If you’re reading this blog, you probably know a good amount of words to string together and formulate a book. Even if it’s not Nobel Prize material quite yet. You could do it.

Swimming and Writing a Book?

Stick with me in this long-winded analogy, okay? It will make sense. Along with all the things you’re reading about me do, I also teach kids how to swim in the summer. I did not swim thousands of miles a day for eight years for it to go to waste.

Let me tell you something about kids… they are in one of two camps. They are either unbelievably unafraid where they jump into the pool with no lifeline and no idea how to swim. This camp is sparse and so refreshing as a teacher. Then, there’s the camp that most children find themselves in when they try just about anything new – terrified of their utter demise.

Don’t get me wrong. You need to fear the water a little bit so you don’t dive into a winding river that is NOT supposed to be swam in. Usually what children fear, though, is their own lack of knowledge. They could swim perfect laps in the shallow end and the minute they know they can’t stand they’ll forget all about it. Arms will start flailing, legs will spazz, and that head goes under fast. When you start telling kids that their bodies, their minds, and their muscles naturally know how to help them to the top, they just have to calm down and let it happen, something changes for them.

I have a kid in my classes that was terrified of the deep end. He could swim like he was on a swim team in the shallow end. He told me that he was still scared of sinking to the bottom no matter how many times I told him I wouldn’t let that happen. When I finally described that his lungs are full of air to help him to the top, his fear washed away with every jump. He yells “When I’m calm, I float!” Which is both adorable and true.

You Body Knows, You Need Calm

Whether or not you want to believe it, your body, mind, and muscles all know how to push forward. They know how to keep you afloat and help you survive. When you take a big plunge like going to college, making a big investment, or taking a year off to write a book, your body reacts how you allow it to.

“I can write a book today,” is an affirmation that not everyone has. However, putting that calm, clear truth into the world allows your body to go with the flow. Giving into the overwhelm and stress is the start of your flapping arms. Screaming at your spouse about alone time while you write your chapters is the spazzing of feet. When you start to resent the action, rather than love the process… that’s your head going under.

So… You Could Write a Book Today, Right?

This goes for any big dive that you take in this life. It’s easy to resent those big moves when you’re exerting all your energy in the process. No, I’m not teaching a group of children that swimming is just letting water do what it wants to you, which is not what I’m advocating for your life jumps either. I am, however, telling you to love the process because there was a moment you didn’t think you could.

Book writing was my deep end of the pool. I was terrified of the utter demise that was putting my words onto paper and people reading them. I’m not like Jen Sincero or Rachel Hollis. They were the Olympic swimmers to me in floaties. As I kept writing, researching, and loving my own mind, I realized that I could write a book today. I could write ten books. It might be scary and take practice, but my heart already knows how to keep me afloat and write the words. 

What’s a big jump you’ve been waiting to take? Would your body know what to do? Let me know in my socials below!

Setting Boundaries for Online Sharing

My favorite self-help queen, Rachel Hollis, is in what she calls a “difficult season” right now. She’s gracious enough to share these little glimpses of her life as it drastically changes. She’s allowing her followers and readers to see a little bit of her pain through her emails, podcasts, and posts. However, as someone who’s felt pain so deep that you feel hollow, I know that she’s only allowing us a glimpse. She’s set a healthy boundary on what the world is allowed to see into her private, personal life.

For a long time, I’ve broadcasted pain, hurt, and embarrassment online. I’ve told the Internet how much I weigh and that one of my family members called me fat. One time, I told my podcast that I wanted to kill myself for about 75% of my Junior Year or high school. I’ve given you my prescriptions. My stomach sank as I let the world know that my boyfriend was cheating on me. I’ve told you all about my migraines that make me feel like an alien. Still, I walk around with next to zero regret for any of the things that I’ve shared online.

As a blogger, it’s difficult to separate what I should share and what I should keep to myself. In one frame of mind, the more that I’m vulnerable with you, the more you might feel empowered, safe, and strong. On the other, though, where do we draw the line between vulnerability and tearing your heart out?

Here’s Rachel’s argument on setting boundaries:

In her podcast, “Seven Things that Are Helping Me Through This Dark Season,” Rachel talks about how people are really quick to judge what, how, or when we’re willing to share our grievances. For her, they’re expecting another New York Times Best Seller when all she wants time away from her life. In my case, I think I’m expected to put everything I’ve been through online. As if not blogging about it makes it less of my truth; my story.

As Rachel says in the podcast (which I think you should go listen to even if you’re not going through a dark season), no one gets to tell you how to mourn. No one gets to tell you how to handle the things that pop up in your life. Even the therapists that we pay the big bucks don’t instruct us how to deal with our problems. Rather, they help us wade through chaos or mixes of emotions we can’t quite get through on our own.

Truth be told, even as a blogger, there are things in my life that you don’t know about me. I’m a pretty open book, but there are struggles in my life that are no longer relevant to the journey, uplevel, or message I want to spread now! Does that make them any less a part of my story? No. Does someone telling me I don’t have a story make me want to tell them? Still, no.

At the end of the day, when you close all the apps, shut your laptop, and actually power down, you have to be proud of that person laying there. Setting boundaries is one of the healthiest things you can do in any relationship or friendship. It can also be so successful for feeling good about what you’re putting out into the world via social media. Setting boundaries allows you to advocate for yourself. When people try to tear down that wall, a clear boundary is the highest, strongest, fortress you can arm yourself with. 

Having trouble with setting boundaries with your online sharing? Want to learn the benefit of setting boundaries? Get in contact with me using any of my socials below – I would love to hear from you!

I Fear My Own Success

Recently, I’ve been listening to a podcast called “The RISE Podcast with Rachel Hollis”. If you recognize the name, it’s because she’s written books like Girl, Wash Your Face and Girl, Stop Apologizing. Her and husband also run a multi-million dollar media company that they essentially started from scratch aka MY DREAM.

When I listen to podcasts, it’s usually while I’m doing 15 other things to be completely honest. Like, I’ll be folding laundry or cleaning and listening. Or, I’ll be bullet journaling and “listening”. In those instances, I find myself missing some stuff and having to go back every so often. If you haven’t found out yet, humans aren’t good multitaskers (but that, is for another day, another blog.) With this podcast, I have to listen to it when I’m doing literally nothing else OR I have to have my iPad near me to jot down some notes if I feel so inclined. Listening made me realize that that’s the kind of information that I want to give you. Yes, of course there’s an entertainment level about all of this. But, if I want to start making a real difference, I have to pull out all the stops and just completely give you what I know.

I was listening to “What’s Keeping You from Making a Million Dollars?” when I kind of realized that I’m terrified of my own success. Not in a way that I don’t want money, I don’t want people to download the podcast, or that I don’t want people to follow my media platforms. No, I’m starting to realize that I’m terrified by what real success represents in my life.

This is because I’m terrified of both change and the unknown. I journaled about this today, so I feel like I understand my inner dialogue a little more. But, truthfully, I would rather sit in the comfort (or even discomfort) of where I am right now, then be successful and change my lifestyle. Think about it, when you’re abundantly successful, everything changes. Your home life, your schedule, your work load, your relationships, and everything in between. In order to be successful, you have to also welcome those changes. This is something I haven’t been doing at all. Like yes, I want to make more money, but I’m not willing to give up the flexibility in my schedule that I currently have if I do become that successful. Or yes, I would love to make this a more permanent livelihood, but I’m not sure I would be ready to move.

None of this is to say that you don’t have a say in how you are successful. You are the queen of your own journey – in whatever that journey is. BUT, it’s more a realization that with levels of success comes natural changes to lifestyle, schedule, work ethics, and just plain life. Fear of those changes will ward away a certain level of success that is absolutely obtainable if you’re “all in” as they say.

Since I was a kid, I have felt in my bones that I was supposed to be heard. When I was younger, that dream was about being a singer and famous. As I grew up and entered dark stages of my life, I genuinely didn’t think I would make it to a point that I could stand in front of people and be heard – so I wrote. In the last few years, I’ve gone from wanting to be a politician to just wanting to be an advocate for those struggling to find their own. Now, I feel this fire in my soul that what I have to say is meant for more than just a couple hundred followers. I have this eye on a prize of success, when I don’t really know what that means yet. I say this to my family and close friends all the time, but this journey really does feel like a time bomb that’s just waiting to burst onto the scene. Maybe, the reason this bomb hasn’t exploded is because my fear of the aftermath.

I’m writing this with so much certainty in my tone not because I’m naive of the chance of failure, but because this finally feels like the spark I felt as a kid is getting bigger. It finally feels like I’m growing into the person that 5 year old Emily would be proud of. When abundant success does happen, life will change. BUT, those key people, aspects, and players will change along with it; to adapt to this new found success. So, my little sweeties, this is the year I welcome success and consider all the forms it’s presented to me in. Change is scary as fuck – business or no business. But, the only way I can keep this spark growing is if I allow the flame to build and other parts of my life to catch on fire along with my soul.

So, I just realized I fear my own success… and I’m not scared anymore.